Brief Guidelines to Enter Islamic Marriage

This brief advise is intended to help Muslim husband and wife to-be prepare themselves with basic knowledge to enter marriage life. I collected and summarised this from different sources and insya Allah is applicable across all madzhabs.

1. When one goes into his wife on his wedding night, he should show her kindness by presenting her with a bunch of flowers, something to drink, etc.
2. The husband should, at the time of consummating the marriage with his wife or before that, place his hand on the front part of her head, mention the name of Allâh Most High, and pray for Allâh's blessings.
3. It is desirable for the husband and wife to pray 2 rakât together on their wedding night.
4. When a Muslim man is about to enter his wife, he should always say first: Bismillahi, Allâhumma jannibnâ ash-shaitân, wa jannib ash-shaitân mâ razaqtana [In the name of Allâh, O Allâh, keep us away from the devil, and keep the devil away from that which You may grant us (ie. offspring).]
5. It is allowed for a Muslim man to enter his wife in her vagina from any direction he wishes - from behind or from the front.
6. It is forbidden for a Muslim man to enter his wife in her anus.
7. When a Muslim man has had sexual intercourse with his wife in the legal manner and then wishes to return another time, he should first perform wudhû’, but bathing is preferable.
8. It is permissible for the husband and wife to bath together in the same place even though he sees her private parts, and she sees his.
9. It is best for husband and wife not to sleep after having sex until they first perform wudhû'. This wudhû’ is not obligatory, but is very highly and definitely commendable. It is also permissible to make Tayammum sometimes instead of wudhû’ before sleeping. But again, bathing is preferable.
10. It is forbidden for a Muslim man to have sexual intercourse with his wife when she is menstruating. Whoever is overcome by desire and has sexual intercourse with his wife when she is menstruating and before she becomes clean must give the value of one dinar's weight of gold or about 4.25 grams (4.2315 to be more precise), or half that amount. It is allowed for him to enjoy pleasure with his wife in any way except for her private parts when she is on her period.
11. When she becomes clean of any menstrual blood, and the flow stops completely, it is allowed for them to resume sexual activity after she washes the place where the blood had been, or performs wudhû’, or takes a complete bath.
12. Withdrawing the penis from the vagina at the time of ejaculation with the purpose of avoiding impregnation is allowed but can only be done with the permission of one's wife. This practice, however, is not preferable.
13. It is forbidden for either the husband or the wife to spread any of the secrets of their bedroom to anyone outside.
14. Both spouses should enter into marriage with the following intentions: freeing themselves of unfulfilled sexual desires, and protecting themselves from falling into that which Allâh has forbidden (i.e. adultery and fornication). What's more, a reward as the reward for sadaqa (voluntary giving of charity) is recorded for them every time they have sex.
15. It is desirable for the husband to go to his relatives who came to visit him in his house, on the following morning, to give them greetings and pray for them. It is also desireable for them to do likewise for him.
16. The married couple must have a place to bathe in their house, and the husband must not allow his wife to go to the public bath houses.
17. The husband must sponsor a feast after the consummation of the marriage. The Sunnah of the Wedding Feast:

• It should be held three days after the first wedding night.
• One should invite the righteous to his banquet whether they be rich or poor.
• If one is able, he should have a feast of one or more sheep.
• It is allowed to give the wedding banquet with any food which is available and affordable, even if that does not include meat.
• It is commendable for the wealthy to help in the preparations for the wedding feast.

How to Perform Ghusl Janabah

1. Wash the private parts.
2. Wet the hair by taking water to the roots of the hair.
3. Perform wudhu’ (ablution) without washing feet.
4. Pour water across the body starting from right side, then wash the whole body.
5. Wash the feet.
6. Finish off with Shahadah.